fuzzy earmuffs

anytime i wash my hair Rylee asks "where we going". smart girl she knows mamas not getting clean and decent just to play in the house ;). So i told her we'd be dropping Griffy off @ Nana's and then we were meeting Daddy at a new place. I paused i didnt know what to tell her . I started back up with "this place is going to help you". she says "oh are they gonna make my canker sores go away". ( due to all her anxiety & stress she has constent canker sores) She asked if they were a Dr. and i told her not exactly they were called an Occuptional Therapist, and we were going there so they could help her be less fearful of certain sounds. Ry says "yea the sounds scare me, maybe they can give me fuzzy earmuffs that could help"

bless my babies heart, i know this wont cure her , but i hope soon she can go into the back yard again & play like a 5 yr old should!

If anyone is more curious about SPD (sensory processing disorder) check out this site

http://www.sensory-processing-disorder.com/SPD-symptom-checklist-for-infants-and-toddlers.html

pessimistic at heart

ive always been told to give people a chance but i merely need an hr or two with someone and i can tell if things are going to go well or not..

Today was our first meeting with a new child psychologist. i keep saying new because we used to see one a few yrs ago. Ok anywho, this is a super awesome facility in a great part of town so my hopes were high. First off she was way too soft spoken for me , i know that sounds stupid but i need someone lively and full of gusto to help me with my kiddo, she seemed sheepish.. I brought a video clip of rylee screaming in terror as griffin crawled closer. and she asked "If there was anyway she could be playing me" .. Oh man i kept my cool but i let her know she offended me and that Rylee doesnt have the know of to play someone, to pull a trick or to even be mean on purpose! She continued to apologize throughout the session and the more we told her she seemed to be getting a bit more closer to "getting" it. i dunno im not hopeful.. Oh yea and while she watched the video clip she dropped my camera !! An accident of course but geeze.. Oh if anyone is nosey or just curious and would like to see this video clip , just ask. I dont mind sharing so people can get a climps into my world of havinga child with Aspergers Anxiety & Sensory Processing Disorder..

The diaper war!

We are 4 week out till Miss Rylee's 5th Birthday.. and sadly enough she is still in diapers :(, Ill admit i havent been a hardcore trainer, but thats only because her Dr.s have told me it wouldnt help. So Ive taken the relaxed approach about it, and weve made some progress, but its slow going. A child with Aspergers does not have the same strong desire to be a "big kid/fit in" as other children do. She is "just rylee" as she'll state,and its obvious she doent need to do things others think are socially acceptable to feel good about herself . Ive recently told her that they no longer let you go to Chuckecheese if u are wearing a diaper, she was very dissapointed to hear this news but has made no attempt to use the potty.. Everyone tells me oh just stick underwear on her and she'll hate feeling wet and that will work. Nope not Rylee , she has ruined two desk chairs so far because she is too preoccupied to be concerned with getting up and going to the bathrm! arghhh We have 6 months till Kindergarten starts, no doubt kids will know shes a little different, but i just dont want them to laugh at her or call her baby if she still has to be in pull ups :(

Middle of the night Streaking!

a common issue among children with an ASD (autism spectrum disorder) is sleep issues, trouble going to sleep & trouble staying asleep. Rylee battles both! She takes melatonin which is something the body should already naturally produce. This helps her fall asleep but definitely doesnt help her stay asleep. She frequently has parties in her rm around 1, 2, 3ish am !! Well this morning around 2 am, i heard her open her door, she has no clue how to do anything quietly! ha, anywho I waited a min expecting her to appear at my bedside, she never did so i knew a good mom would get out of bed and check on their child . At 2 am I really wanted to be a bad mom but I got up. I went to her rm, no Rylee in there, hmmm.. I head down the hall into the living rm all the while saying her name I get to the doorway of the playrm, and in the dark i see her on the floor NAKED and feverishly hunting for something. Well not completely naked, she had slippers on ;) I said "Rylee what are u doing" she responds" I cant find my princess", i say "Ry where are ur clothes, u should be in bed" she says "ohhhhhhhhh", ahh bless her poor confused heart. I walk her back to her rm and discover the very wet diaper on the floor (our other biggest battle shes not potty trained)..

5am

blah 5 am is just way to early!! but the baby boy woke me up, i some how managed to get him back to sleep but instead of returning to bed myself i got my booty on the exercise bike. I think i did 3 miles or so, the lights were out so i couldnt see the lcd screen. then both kiddos were up and i had to get the day going , once everyone was fed i fired up the wii and started the ea active fitness. my daughter joined me, bless her heart she really tried to do those lunges! i didnt make it all the way through my 20 min workout, im not feeling like a failure though because i know ill get there. after a min or so rest from that i did some work on my arms, i have 3, 5, and 8 pound weights. i felt it was safest to start out with the 3s ! this may not sound like much to some, but i know its a great start to getting these 30 something pounds off. may have find the strength over the next 6 months to keep it up!!!

obsessed much..

yes ! haha my new current obsession my baby boys feet!! i cant stop touching them, kissing them every chance i get. is any other mom out there so footsie crazy ??!! it makes me sad that in a few short years those feet will be big and smelly and it would look weird for me to kiss all over them ha.

Top 5..

Annoyances :

1. when the young girls who work at the tanning bed call me sweetie

2. people who never say excuse me when they clearly get in ur way

3. drivers who seem to forget if they want to go slower they should be in the right hand lane

4. little girls in mini skirts with designer purses

5.crap im too tired to remember my 5th ! haha

what happend??

I used to have confidence , I used to feel pretty, i used to feel sexy . Now I can barely stand the sight of my self in the mirror. I am 40 pounds heavier then what i was when my husband and i met & married. How in the world can he still be attracted to me!?! He swears he is and thats great but can i help it if i wish other men found me attractive too. I have a closet full of clothes that i cant wear, i currently have one pair of jeans and maybe 4 tops i can wear. I feel like a slob. Everyday i wake up and think ok today is the day for change. but no i eat what i want, and i never seem to find the energy for working out. I whine, and moan, and sulk about my body every sec. of every day yet i cant seem to figure out how to make the change. What is it going to take??

dont go..

Having Daddy work so much lately has been hard on all of us, we are a close family and truly enjoy and value our time together. This morning when Rylee realized daddy needed to leave for work, this is what happend...

He finally had to say u know all those toys u like well daddy cant buy them if he doesnt go to work, and she let go of his leg ;)

Pet of the day

My Rylee girl is often a different animal every day spending the day sounding like said animal, acting out like the animal would, my fav. is when shes a squirrel she has the cutest squirrel noise. But often she is a cat. In the car when listening to her fav. songs such as music from Plain White T's and All time Low(yea shes got good taste) she sings along like a cat. She knows the words she just chooses to meow like a cat. We enjoy her quirkiness as the rest of the world seems so boring after knowing miss Ry :)

Tonight Chris my husband & I sat down to watch The Middle, they have a son who lets just say he's" different", and he spends the night with another "different" kid.. We nearly spit out our drinks when we heard the boy meow! Thats are Rylee we said!

my mom stopped by today so i could have a free moment to do some cleaning (im a bit of a neat freak & really dont like a dirty home) anywho, she brought with her a heart shaped vday balloon for Rylee. And for anyone who doesnt know Rylee is my almost 5 yr old daughter who has Aspergers Syndrome, Anxiety disorder, SPD, & hyperlexia, oh and shes not potty trained, ok now ur caught up on her, any questions just ask. :) Ok back to the balloon, i heard her talking to it in my bedrm, i walk in to find her in bed with the balloon. It was even covered partially, & she informed me she had named him Handsome :)

Brand new..

I am so green at this, forgive me if i suck! I started this blog, in hopes to hmm, im not really sure what i hope to do with this blog, but maybe people will enjoy my ramblings :) Ive been a homemaker for the last 6 yrs, and have formed many opinions about many things so maybe this will be a place i can share those.